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The 3 steps to breaking free from perfectionism and embracing your new identity as a leader

If you’re a business owner or leader, chances are you’ve proclaimed yourself to be a ‘perfectionist’ when it comes to executing and producing results. The pride you have in the work you produce has propelled yours and your business’ success — until it hasn’t. The flip side of being a perfectionist leader is overwhelm, burnout, and worst of all – paralysis.

So what does it take to escape this perfectionist trap and reassess your identity so that you’re not held back by this relentless urge to “do things the ‘right’ way (your way)?” It isn’t an overnight process, but it ultimately comes down to 3 key steps: embracing vulnerability, building self-trust, and shifting the focus from doing to leading. Here’s what to prepare for in each of these phases:

Relinquishing your perfectionist ‘fear’ by embracing vulnerability

The first step in making the internal shift away from perfectionism is embracing vulnerability. Being a perfectionist, at its core, is rooted in fear—the fear of making mistakes, of judgment, and of perceived failure. It’s a defensive stance that likely makes you armor yourself against vulnerability to shield your ego and maintain control. However, this armor also blocks the ability for growth, innovation, and genuine connection with your team and yourself.

Embracing vulnerability means shifting to a more forgiving and growth-oriented mindset. It requires acknowledging your limitations and being open about them with yourself and your team. It may feel like a weakness to share this openness, but it is actually a strength because you are proving that you're willing to accept ideas and answers that you wouldn't have been able to find on your own. Not only does this take the pressure off of you, but it also empowers your team to take initiative and to serve as a support system that you wouldn't have have been able to tap into otherwise.

Building self-trust in order to have the confidence to 'let go'

You may be inclined to say that the reason why you can't delegate is because you don't trust your team to meet your expectations, but the real reason why you have this assessment is because you don't trust yourself to be a decision-maker rather than a contributor. Before you can truly rely on your (already competent) team, you must cultivate the confidence to lean into being the leader that your employees need.

Self-trust in leadership doesn't equate to having the ability and motivation to do everything 'right' - it's about believing in yourself and staying committed to your team even when things go 'wrong.' If you truly want your business to thrive, then you should never reach the point where things are 'perfect' because that indicates that you and your company have stopped growing. Trusting yourself is about leaning into your intuition and strengthening your decision-making muscle, not just falling back on your execution muscle.

Shifting the focus from doing to leading - empowering yourself and your team

Redefining your leadership identity involves a fundamental shift in focus—from being an individual contributor who excels at tasks to being a visionary leader who empowers others. This shift is pivotal if you've been trapped in the cycle of perfectionism, as it requires letting go of the compulsion to do everything yourself.

The key to avoiding falling back into the trap of needing 'control' over every aspect of these strategies is to develop metrics that you can use to measure progress for every initiative you've created for your business. Many perfectionist leaders find that, initially, they "run out of things to do" because they're no longer in the weeds of the work they've delegated. The best way to stay "occupied" is to think of yourself as a resource and a reference point for the rest of your team to use to stay motivated and continue to produce at a high level.

Click below to read the full blog article:

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Things I found helpful this week:

• This episode from the Tim Ferriss Show where he interviews former Stripe COO Claire Hughes Johnson - go to 44:18 to learn about the concept of a 'working-with-me' document and how it's the most valuable tool any leader can create.
• This LinkedIn post by Liz Fosslien that illustrates how success and failure work together to lead you to success.
• This quote: "Perfectionism is not the same thing as striving for excellence. Perfectionism is not about healthy achievement and growth; it's a shield." - Brené Brown

I hope you found something helpful or insightful here - please reply back and let me know what topics you’d like me to cover in future issues. See you next Thursday!

-Anais

P.S. If you enjoyed reading this, please send it to someone who might find it helpful as well. If you were forwarded this email, please consider subscribing to receive future issues and follow me on LinkedIn and Instagram for more business and leadership content.

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